I got my ticket for the long way round.

I'm pretty sure I know what this silence means. If I'm right, I guess I've been preparing for it for awhile now. If I'm wrong, well, then who knows?

My pool still isn't open which is extremely annoying since other pools are and the fire marshal evidently told Sunlake they need a presence out there in case people aren't distancing. I'm not sure why one apartment complex has different rules than the other but I'm sure it has something to do with the fact that Sunlake just doesn't want to bother with the pools right now.

I bought a surprise for myself so that I can do something creative and not worry all the goddamn time. It comes in tomorrow so I have the weekend to mess with it.

Haven't been working much on my project lately. My head is too wrapped up in the right now, not the back then. I feel like a robot, just completing pre-determined tasks at their appointed time. I know it won't last forever though. Life inches forward and then leaps when you least expect it.

I feel like I spend most of my time (life) waiting, and I don't want to, but I don't know how to stop. I don't want to wait around to watch someone be done with me, I guess, but I don't have much room to move forward right now.

I guess all this bleh is because I haven't been sleeping well. I mean, I sleep, but when I wake up, it feels as if I've tossed and turned all night. I plan to do a hard-reset this weekend, maybe see Dani if I end up going to Luling for Father's Day. Maybe I just need to isolate and do some things that stimulate my brain.

-Rae