Once

I don’t think I’ll ever love again without constantly looking for the small print, the punchline, the trapdoor.

You only love without looking down a few times in your life, and when that ability is gone, you never notice it until you try again. You tell yourself you’d do anything to be capable of it just one more time, forgetting that it was exactly that which got you here in the first place.

fuck there is simply too much emotional homework involved in being an adult