You know that I'm no good

On Friday I stayed home and slept because I felt like hammered shit when I woke up. No, I'm not pregnant. A sick patient came in Thursday before I left and wiped her DNA on everything and I didn't know she was sick until the therapist informed me. I slept as much as I could.

Woke up and hang out with Sid Saturday. Ate at Walk-On's and saw Pet Semetary. It was pretty damn good. Spent Saturday night in a writing fever.

My phone stayed quiet.

Sunday I got up early and went to cemetery. Need to find a new spot, I am running out of places. Got a wild hair and ran to Another Broken Egg for city grits, ran into Stacie and Sam outside of District. Came home, took a bath.

I watched a documentary on Netflix called Social Animals, which was about Instagram. One of the guys on there is an urban exploration photographer in New York, seventeen years old. He started climbing bridges in Manhattan and made himself into an Instagram celebrity. Made me realize how far behind I am, and how little risks I take. I do want to go downtown and try seeing what I can find in the Marigny, but being alone in New Orleans makes me hyper-aware these days. Oh well, no pain, no gain. It also made me realize that the word 'like' needs to be beaten out of millennials. Preferably with a chair. Or a tire iron. I'm not picky. It was an interesting documentary, even though it made me want to gouge out their eyeballs with a spoon. Autum and Riley came over so she could use my computer for some job stuff. Riley watched the Spiderverse movie. Went to bed early, but the tornado alarm started going off on my phone and woke me up. Excellent weather.

I had to come in early today because of work maintenance issues. Joanie and I switched late days so I can go home early today. I did not want to get up out of bed and almost overslept. I can't keep my eyes open right now. That's what you get for writing like you're drowning.

GOT party this weekend at my place, I volunteered to take it over since Lina's about to explode with a fetus. I kind of got a late start on it so I don't know how many people will be able to make it. If no one else RSVP's yes I'll just cancel it and Brad and Scott and I can watch on our own. Not really much in the mood for a big gathering anyway, but Scott was nice enough to offer his help with getting a few snacks, like drinks and chips.

I know I've got to make an attempt to relax this weekend and to let things flow through me rather than against me, but it was an intense weekend and I'm not sure if I'm ready to feel vulnerable again. Because I feel extremely so, and I fucking hate it. I have to nut up.

Have to.

-Rae