I read over my last blog post.
Sounds a little bitchy.
I'd rather let it out here then to let it fly out there, because as many stones as I'd like to throw, I'm fully aware that I have a basket of stones with my name on them, somewhere.
I must write and delete at least four or five statuses a day. I weigh them and edit them and read them over and I find myself grading them by the people who like them. Those who say, 'Jesus, Rae-get a life' are the same motherfuckers with little green dots by their name every time I log onto Facebook. And hey, it's a drug. Let's just cut the shit right here and admit that we're all injecting it.
Everyone gets to grade everyone else's life. Their house. Their weddings. Their pets. Their vacations. And of course, everything has to be perfect. Except when someone disrupts the status quo and expresses an opinion, and then shit hits the fan. And then we still tie the tourniquet, tap the vein, break the skin.
Ever seen Black Mirror, episode Nosedive?
If you haven't:
Bryce Dallas Howard (armed with a phone and a truly disgusting sense of fashion) is part of a future where the likes on your social posts affect everything you do-the quality of house you own, your credit score, your invitations to social events. You yourself get a score, and being rude to a stranger can cause them to find you, down vote you, and ultimately cause that score to plummet. On one side of the coin, people might be a little fucking nicer to each other if such etiquette determined the quality of the house you live in. On the tails, social media makes things hard enough.
Watching that episode made my phone feel like a thirty pound weight in my hand.
So I can't give up the 'heroin', but I don't have to like it. I need for the people I know to matter more then a like.
I have to go. Sid is wearing my mermaid tail.
-Rae